This September I decided to take a hiatus from drinking alcohol. It is not the first time I have done this. A year ago I took about 10 months off from drinking because my body was reacting badly to it and I found myself more sensitive to the effects and so decided to cut it out.
When I first took an alcohol break I don’t remember craving it very much. There were times socially that I wanted to have a drink but my body was so resistant to it that I didn’t have a problem with it. Typically there are a few reasons that cravings or the desire to drink come up: emotional, mental or environmental.
Many times we go through emotional issues that cause us to want a release and drinking usually seemingly helps release these emotions or stressors for the short term. Other times just a fleeting thought or mention of going to have a drink can cause us to crave alcohol. Or being in an certain environment, like a bar or a party where a lot of other people are drinking can make us want to join in.
What I have found interesting when taking breaks from drinking has been the peer pressure to continue to drink. First of all, this is fascinating to me as a person in my 30’s to have other adults trying to peer pressure me into having a drink when I am on a break. I thought I left college a long time ago…but I guess some things die hard.
The really interesting piece that I discovered is that when you take a break from something like drinking, all of a sudden you become a mirror to all the people around you. I found that I was making some people really uncomfortable by not drinking with them. This is where some peer pressure or luring me to “just have one” would begin. I was astonished to find some people reacting with “you are no fun”, “what are you pregnant?” and my favorite ” lame”. Wow…
I understand that drinking is a social activity and people like to do it together but it isn’t a necessity for connection and fun. During this time I saw how my friends and other people around me started to look at themselves. Questioning whether they should cut back, were they being healthy enough or was I judging them. There was never judgement on my part. I just wanted to do my thing. I didn’t realize that it would impact those around me more than myself.
After enough time, I got used to going out and not drinking and those around me got used to it too. I started to help some of my clients cut back in drinking after this period and found they struggled with the social pressures too. Sometimes it was themselves who assumed people would judge them if they didn’t drink and other times the co-workers and friends around them really did give a hard time with it. I found people wanted to give excuses as to why they weren’t drinking, as if saying “I am not drinking right now” isn’t good enough. Much of our society doesn’t seem to accept not drinking unless you have a drinking problem, are pregnant, on a cleanse or running some marathon. Only at those times do you get the “oh, ok…that’s fine then”.
What I have continued to remind myself and my clients is that if someone reacts badly to something they are doing, it is not them or what they are doing that is the problem. One should be proud to be doing something healthy for their body and recognize that the person with the reaction is the one with the issue. It is best to hold strong to what you know your body needs and not take anything anyone says personally.
It can seem like a hard thing to do but the more we practice understanding this, the easier it gets.
